Rebuilding Hope

What if I told you it’s only a subtle shift of the mind…

Your echoing no

Your persistent rejection

Your call to shut me down

And passive comment to try again

And better luck next time

And still not quite enough for me

Reverberates off the cylinder

Booming through my mind

A cascading torrent of words

Giving rise to defeat

To loss

To never agains and I’m dones

Shattering my crystal hope

To lay scattered at my feet

Worn from walking and trying

And trying

And trying

And trying

And trying

And trying

Until collapse is the only solution

Into a ball of darkness

Soaked in rich, poisonous failure

And words that are not mine

You, Them, They, It

Whoever

Whatever you are

Once broke me down in a moment

In a beat tempo’d in line

With a heart that’s not mine

Until I decided

Your no became my drive

Your rejection my opportunity

Your shut down my chance to bloom

Shifting your try agains to I’m on my way

Your better luck next times to what did I gain this time

And still not enough for me’s to I deserve better

Softening the bellowing storm of words

To hold and honor the defeat

Water the loss

And erupt from the earth

Rebuilding that hope

To try and try and try and try

Again

The no’s

The rejection

The thanks but no thanks

No longer makes me want it more

Rather,

Only makes me want better

Love always,

Riss